Help Me Help... Well... Me.

I’ve got nothing for today, once again. I am absolutely serious about this being the most boring stretch of days on the whole calendar. I’m not helping any by lying rather low these past few weekends, but after the holidays and before my upcoming two weeks of social obligations, I’ve felt the need to recharge my batteries. And I regret nothing.

Anyhoo, [Dennis Miller] since I’m about as useful as affirmative action in 1870’s Georgia [/Dennis Miller], I turn to you fine people for two things which I need help with:

1) The Lady Friend and I are flying out to Phoenix on Friday and are looking for something to do that night. She suggested “go to the Grand Canyon” but since we’re not an early 1970’s ABC sitcom, I really don’t see the need for riding some donkey down a cliff, getting lost, and stumbling upon some wise Indians who help us find not only ourselves, but also each other, instead of – you know – something useful like the fucking interstate.

My second suggestion (“Go to a Suns game”) went over only slightly better than my first (“threesome”), so I don’t think that’s going to cut it, either.

So, if you’ve ever been to Phoenix and did something cool, be a pal and let me know what it was. Please.

2) For any of you St. Louis folks – I’m getting sick and/or tired of crappy cuts of meat from my neighborhood Schnuck’s and I believe it’s time I found myself a butcher. I had an awesome one back up in Peoria, and I miss them dearly. Since I don’t have any real family around this place, I’m turning to you, the Internets, to help me find an Al Fritz approved butcher in St Louis.

All I’m looking for is good, quality meat (“That’s what she said.”) and a nice selection – steaks, chops, poultry, the usual. I’d just go to Whole Foods for my weekly shopping, but I have yet to go in there and spend less than $75 on a single meal for two (and it’s not that they’re too expensive, it’s just by the time I’ve grabbed two steaks, I’ll see a bottle of wine which peaks my interests and one or three or eight weird beers which sole reason for being is to live forever in my magical tummy,* along with a fresh loaf of bread, some sushi, a ginger ale, and some squash. Every fucking time we’re there, I shit you not.), so I can’t imagine how much shopping for a whole week’s worth of food would set me back. Other than that, I’m not looking for anything fancy – Just quality meat (again, “That’s what she said.”)

However, I am restricted somewhat by geography. Well, “restricted” really isn’t the word. I guess it’s actually “lazy.” I’m lazy. And I fucking hate driving in this town, so I pretty much refuse to go west of 170 on 40 and west of 270 on 44. Hence, I’m looking for a butcher in the city proper. Actually, something outside of the city would probably work, too. I’ll just send The Lady Friend.

(Although, considering she’s engaged to me, she probably doesn’t have the faintest clue about what quality meat really is. So... )

Anyway, sorry about the boring post, but I’m seriously working with nothing over here. I swear, this weekend I’ll get all boozed up and drive my rental car through a museum or steal a few of Nathan Arizona’s many babies or something equally ridiculous and write about it next Tuesday.

But for now, if you kids could just assemble into some sort of advisory board and help me find a quality butcher and something to do in Phoenix on a Friday night, I will forever be in your gratitude, and, if you play your cards right, will open mouth kiss you.

*I love saying “tummy.”

Labels: ,

I( don't know anything about Pheonix, but my family has always gone to Kenrick's in st louis for our food. http://www.kenricks.com/index.html
Thanks, whomever you are. I'll check them out.

And this shit show of a post already got one more message than I thought it would!
A butcher? That's easy....

Hanlen's Meat Shoppe & Cater
11037 Manchester Rd
Kirkwood, MO 63122

(314) 966-8606

Definitely not right down the street, but its worth it.

Baumann's at manchester and brentwood is right in the 40-170 area. Or G&W, right behind Don Brown (you know-at the entance to the Hill). It's where they make the brats for Grant's Farm, and that shit is delicious.
aaaaand, that about covers it!
Oh yeah, and G&W will even give you a free Busch beer while you're shopping. Can't beat that. Perfect way to start off a Saturday of grilling, with a cold can at 10 am.
Man, blogs are so helpful! Thanks everybody!

And Mozzy, holding out on that butcher of yours is worse than when you didn't tell me there was a Dell Taco in our 'hood. It's like you're trying to make me starve to death.
If you are ever out in my neighborhood enjoying Octoberfest/Maifest/Sausage Festival/Grape Stomping Day/etc/etc in beautiful Hermann, MO, you should check out the Swiss Meat and Sausage Company. They are just a short little stint down HWY 19 south of Hermann. They've got more brats than you could shake your brat at. Here's their website:


There is another place west of St. Louis that I like called Davis Meat Processing. If you have a large freezer, you can either take your own steer and have it butchered there or buy a half, quarter, or whole steer from them. They do a very good job. We have sent a lot of business their way. Here's their info:

Joe or Cherilyn Davis
Davis Meat Processing LLC
39 Hwy NN
Jonesburg, MO 63351
636-488-5227 fax

I know that you are probably too lazy to make to any either of these, but they are the best that I have found.
Thanks, Jim -- I did a weekend in a b&b in downtown Hermann last Sept and thought about going to the swiss meats place. Now I really wish I would have. Next time.
Downtown Hermann? I didn't know there was such a place.
Post a Comment

<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

"I'll be dead in the cold, cold ground before I recognize the state of Missouri."